theres freedom in saying me too

We all have things we struggle with.

We all have guilt and shame and a part of us we hide so deep down inside and we pray nobody will ever see it.

We put on a smile.
We put on an act.
We say the “right” things.
We do what we’re supposed to.
We pretend to have it all together.

And we think we are doing not only a service to others, but for ourselves as well.

We try not be a burden.
We do what we think will keep us protected and safe.
We close up, and we shut up.

And we suffer…in silence.

I remember a time once when I was newly married, and things were not as easy and blissful as I had imagined the newlywed life would be.
We were two different people, with different ways of dealing with things, and we were trying to merge it all together in a not so graceful way.

Around that time, we started going to a bible study with other young marrieds and each week I would listen and watch and wait….for someone else to confess their struggles so I could feel safe to share mine.

Finally, one night as the guys and girls broke off to pray, I found the Lord wouldn’t allow me to hold it in anymore and out tumbled the truths of my heart.

In that one moment, all my walls crumbled down.
I couldn’t pretend a moment longer.

I needed people to see me, I needed just one person to hear and understand my heart….
Mostly, I just needed to hear those words that would begin my healing,
“Me too….”

It was such a pivotal moment for me…and that night I knew God was showing me a better way.

In all honesty, it was scary.

Sometimes it still is, especially when I bare my life for all to see here.

And sometimes, people don’t get it.
But mostly….people do.

And for every email, for every comment, for every phone call and new friendship born from a “Me too…” moment, makes the risk God has asked me to take, absolutely worth it.

In learning to be honest with other women, I have found and heard so many “Me too’s…” and with each one my heart grows and my faith increases.

I understand myself, I understand them, and an empathy grows even for those who have yet to open up.

In learning to be vulnerable with my husband, he has been able to see beyond my actions and into my heart, and in all of that has been able to love me in just the way I need to be loved.

In being real with my kids, on a level they can understand, it has given them a freedom….a permission to have their own struggles and not feel shame in the midst of it.

God did not put us in this life together to go through it alone.
He did not ask us to pretend and to be fake.
He certainly doesn’t ask us to be perfect.

Our lessons, our lives, and our struggles are allowed, so that we can become stronger and better and able to love and care for the others in our lives.

In doing all of this, we become more like Him.

And THAT is what all this “stuff” is for.

We are not doing any favors by pretending or hiding.

It’s scary, I know.

Not everyone will hold your heart with gentle hands, but the ones who do, will make all the rest worth it.

Sometimes the greatest blessings in our lives are the ones that take the greatest risk.

So, I pray you’re able to find that inner strength, speak up….and say….
“Me too…”

We are not alone.

You are not alone.

“Me too…”