it means nobody can ever take me away again

“Do you know what today is?”

“I’m being adopted.”

“And do you know what that means?”

“It means that I will never be able to be taken away from my family again.”

It was that moment when I heard my first and only foster son utter those words to the judge who not only had seen the case from beginning to end, but was finally about to bring it to a close by signing the adoption papers….that I lost it.

All my emotions, all my stoic attempts at holding it together, crumbled into pieces, and I was struck with all that this little man has been through.

And there were so many emotions.

Happiness.  That he is finally home.  Where God intended for him to be.

Relief.  That it’s all finally over, and he is happy and safe…and in the end, the system I felt was so broken…worked for him.

Guilt.  That I couldn’t or didn’t do more.  That it wasn’t us, even though God showed us time and again it wasn’t supposed to be us.

Awe.  In God.  In the power of prayer.  Awe that by simply bringing our prayer request to our pastor and ultimately to the Lord, that things began to change.  That by letting go of our attempts at control and giving it to over to God, lives were about to be affected in a way we couldn’t have ever expected or hoped for.

Sometimes in life, we pray and we don’t see God working.

I know in the last two years I felt so many times during the whole situation that God wasn’t there…and I didn’t understand why He was allowing certain things to happen.  Or why He was allowing it to take so long.

But in that room where the adoption papers were being signed, I saw the beauty of God’s perfect intricate work.
I saw the beginning, the middle, and the end.
I saw the story complete.
I finally saw what it was all for, and what His will really was.

He saw what He had done…
And it was good.  


God worked, mysteriously and in His own time, but in the end….it was good.

What an incredible faith building lesson and experience these two years have been.

I sat back that adoption day last week and tried to take everything in.
I cried and wept and was overcome with emotions that I couldn’t begin to understand or comprehend.

I realized how small we are, and how big God is.
I realized that with a simple obedience to let go and give it to the Lord in prayer, that miracles can and DO happen.
I realized that you can’t fully enjoy the beauty of a miracle, without the struggle it takes to get there.
I realized that I adore that little boy more than I understood.
And I realized that our friends who adopted him are my hero’s and therefore forever in my heart.

One day, I’ll share the story.
Beginning to end.
And I promise you’ll cry.
But I promise, you will truly understand the meaning of faith and miracles.

Because that is what that day was.

An absolute miracle.

Thank you sweet Lord, for protecting him in a situation that seemed hopeless and impossible.
Thank you for giving us the ability to hear your prompting that we were to take him.
And thank you, for giving us the strength to let him go when our time was up.
You are a God of miracles, and most of all I pray that I never forget this one you have granted me and everyone who loves him.
I love you.


Amen.

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© 2012 “Le Musings of Moi”

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Comments

  1. Summer, thank you for this. My husband and I are in prayer over whether we should get in the middle of something messy. Something really, really messy. It’s lovely to hear a story of God’s providence where it worked out. We’re still praying for guidance but this was a much needed blog post. For me. Thank you.

  2. Beautiful post. It’s difficult in the midst of tough situations to believe that God is in control and this is a beautiful reminder that He is.

  3. Beautiful post! Thank you for sharing this. I needed to hear it today.

  4. Thank you for sharing this. I needed a reminder today 🙂

  5. Wow – what a special relationship and learning experience this has been. I’ve been struggling with God’s timing right now…thank you for this reminder that it’s perfect, even when we don’t understand it!

  6. Summer-Sometimes the hardest thing is being obedient TO GOD, and then waiting to see what He will do! We tend to want to write our own endings, but we did that once in a beautiful garden, and things have been difficult ever since. You were shown so much of yourself and your God through this! We miss out on watching miracles happen right in front of us because we want to do it our way. God ALWAYS has a better way! Thank for the beautiful words!

  7. Summer-Sometimes the hardest thing is being obedient TO GOD, and then waiting to see what He will do! We tend to want to write our own endings, but we did that once in a beautiful garden, and things have been difficult ever since. You were shown so much of yourself and your God through this! We miss out on watching miracles happen right in front of us because we want to do it our way. God ALWAYS has a better way! Thank for the beautiful words!

  8. Summer-Sometimes the hardest thing is being obedient TO GOD, and then waiting to see what He will do! We tend to want to write our own endings, but we did that once in a beautiful garden, and things have been difficult ever since. You were shown so much of yourself and your God through this! We miss out on watching miracles happen right in front of us because we want to do it our way. God ALWAYS has a better way! Thank for the beautiful words!

  9. Summer-Sometimes the hardest thing is being obedient TO GOD, and then waiting to see what He will do! We tend to want to write our own endings, but we did that once in a beautiful garden, and things have been difficult ever since. You were shown so much of yourself and your God through this! We miss out on watching miracles happen right in front of us because we want to do it our way. God ALWAYS has a better way! Thank for the beautiful words!

  10. Summer-Sometimes the hardest thing is being obedient TO GOD, and then waiting to see what He will do! We tend to want to write our own endings, but we did that once in a beautiful garden, and things have been difficult ever since. You were shown so much of yourself and your God through this! We miss out on watching miracles happen right in front of us because we want to do it our way. God ALWAYS has a better way! Thank for the beautiful words!

  11. Summer-Sometimes the hardest thing is being obedient TO GOD, and then waiting to see what He will do! We tend to want to write our own endings, but we did that once in a beautiful garden, and things have been difficult ever since. You were shown so much of yourself and your God through this! We miss out on watching miracles happen right in front of us because we want to do it our way. God ALWAYS has a better way! Thank for the beautiful words!

  12. Summer-Sometimes the hardest thing is being obedient TO GOD, and then waiting to see what He will do! We tend to want to write our own endings, but we did that once in a beautiful garden, and things have been difficult ever since. You were shown so much of yourself and your God through this! We miss out on watching miracles happen right in front of us because we want to do it our way. God ALWAYS has a better way! Thank for the beautiful words!

  13. Summer-Sometimes the hardest thing is being obedient TO GOD, and then waiting to see what He will do! We tend to want to write our own endings, but we did that once in a beautiful garden, and things have been difficult ever since. You were shown so much of yourself and your God through this! We miss out on watching miracles happen right in front of us because we want to do it our way. God ALWAYS has a better way! Thank for the beautiful words!

  14. Summer-Sometimes the hardest thing is being obedient TO GOD, and then waiting to see what He will do! We tend to want to write our own endings, but we did that once in a beautiful garden, and things have been difficult ever since. You were shown so much of yourself and your God through this! We miss out on watching miracles happen right in front of us because we want to do it our way. God ALWAYS has a better way! Thank for the beautiful words!

  15. Oh my.. Tears are taking over. Wow Summer. What an amazing thing, to be a part of a child’s life in just the way they need, right when they need it.

  16. Love this – the story, your process, that you invested in a little one’s life who needed a place to call home for a while. Oh, that more godly people had stepped in for my girls on their foster journey! You gave him an enormous gift Summer. <3

  17. This is just beautiful…brought me to tears. Thanks for sharing and being so open. If only there were more people in the world like you.

  18. I have no words for all the sweetness you all have extended in these comments.

    We were SO imperfect in this situation….almost blind fumbling around reaching for something that felt right.

    I am just so thankful that through our mistakes and imperfections, His will was still completed.

    I love that.

    And all of you, for sharing this journey with me.
    xoxo

  19. I love this so much.  It made me so happy to see you post about this on Facebook.  Even with the little that I know about this story, it touches my heart.  I look forward to the day you are able to share it all.  🙂  

    And, I enjoy all your blondness in this picture.

  20. Danielle Perkio says:

    mmmmm what sweetness. closure. We are so in the midst of this with Jeremy right now. I keep reminding myself to be obedient and let go. It’s so hard to see the bigger picture through the day-to-day messes. Thank you for reminding me to wait for the end, that God’s plan is better than mine, and that we are blessed by the journey as much as the miracle at the close.

  21. Danielle….Oh friend. I SO know what you are going through! Just continue to give this all over to the Lord, and TRUST. Of course, it’s always easier to say that in the end, but if you can do it now, you won’t miss out like I did sometimes. Love you girl, and I’m always praying. xoxo