Wanted: A believable christian. Humble, sweet, forgiving, fun, normal, normal, normal.
There have been so many times in my life that I have really been bothered by Christians. And this is a bit of a problem, you know, considering I am one.
I grew up in a christian home and went to church every week. But, as I grew up, I had my heart broken time and time again. And when hurt comes from a Christian, for some reason, it just stings that much more. I’m not exactly sure why. I mean, we are just as capable of messing up as the next person….
I could even say, to be honest, that there are many times even I am not the best example of what a Christian should be. (Shocker for most of you, I know.) Many days, many many moments a day, I do not represent what my beliefs are really all about.
And in those many moments I’ve wanted to scream….don’t look at me! Don’t watch me!
At one point, after seeing some stuff go on that really just didn’t seem christian-ish, I found myself wondering….Do I even want anything to do with this religion, in which was proving to be full of hypocrites?
So, I took some time away from church. From the bible. From hanging out with other believers.
But after a considerable amount of time, I was still experiencing heartbreak. I was still seeing hypocrisy. I still didn’t love what I was a part of. I realized it didn’t matter who people were, where they came from, or what they believed or stood for…they were all human. They were all capable of messing up just as much as the next person. (I’m a smart cookie, I catch on quick.)
I missed my God. I missed the hope and grace and mercy he brought into my life. I missed the freedom I experienced in Him. I missed what had always been a part of me. And I came back. With a different attitude. A different outlook. With a different understanding of who He was.
I was able to do this, because I realized that I couldn’t keep looking to other people. As much as we are called to be the best we can be….I can’t deny the fact that we are imperfect. So instead I studied the bible. I took time and did my research to really see if it was really true. I prayed, and meditated, and spent time getting to know Him on a personal intimate level.
Understanding christianity became less about other people, and more about God.
I have to continually keep my eyes on Him. On His example, and then do my absolute best to imitate that. And when I can’t, when I just simply don’t feel like it, when it’s on purpose or on accident, I will be the first to admit my defeat. I will learn a lesson. I will find humility in it’s truest form.
This has all been on my mind lately, what with the media focusing on Spencer & Heidi, the Christian moms who outright lied about losing a baby on their well known blogs, Jon & Kate…and so on.
I found myself getting so fired up thinking this is where so many people are getting their ideas of Christianity from! This is what people think it’s all about! This is what turned me, an already established believer, off from my own beliefs!
Once again, I have to remember….
I am no better. I too make mistakes. I too am not always the best example. The only difference is, I don’t have a camera on me at all times.
If I could say anything to anybody out there, if I could teach my own kids something from all of this, or if I could simply just remind myself…
It’s not about them. It’s only about Him.
The only requirement of this job? (Other than…please please don’t go on a reality tv show, unless you can actually put us in a good light. Hence, the wanted ad at the top.)
Find Him, know Him, and then decide for yourself.
If you can handle all that….you’re hired.
© 2009 “Le Musings of Moi”
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Remember this part of the Lord’s prayer?
Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us
Seems pretty applicable.
I was going to raise my hand but then you had to throw the word humble in there. 😉
What is normal anyway? :-p
I like your post very much. So much truth. Of course churches are full of hypocrites… we are to look to Christ. Truth in every word sistah!
I guess that is the proof of having faith, testing it from all angles and finding it still holds up. Congratulations on making it work for you. 🙂
Such honest writing. You are so in touch with your emotions…with yourself. Though I am not religious (pretty much for the same reasons you mentioned II appreciate your view. You represented it so well. Does any of this make sense or is my lack of sleep showing?
Maybe you are closing your mind to other possibilities. I once worked for a business owned by a Christian couple —and left after a few months because they were the most unethical people I had ever met. I’m not saying all Christians are like that, but these particular ones were. An atheist couple I know have adopted several children and are among the most loving, generous people I know. I have friends who are Christian, Hindu, Buddhist, Jewish, atheist, agnostic, and new age. I cannot tell you that one is any better than another. They are all wonderful people. Maybe you can make a list of the qualities you seek regardless of religion. If you open your mind and heart to people of all faiths or no faith at all, you just might find what you seek.
(I’m sponsoring my first GIVEAWAY. Check out my blog for more information.)
So very true….we’re not all perfect and christian folk make mistakes as well. The best thing to do is to try to look inward instead of outward and be the best person you can be.
Summer –
What a wonderful post. I too am a Christian and I will tell you, have a lot of the same feelings. It’s so hard to represent God at times when there is so much bad and complete hypocrisy in the world.
It makes me mad that when you look at who the media focuses on, it’s people like Spiedi and the Gosselins – they are totally the worst examples EVER. But, it’s easier to focus on a train wreck then the good that’s out there.
It certainly makes it hard to live, no? But when we focus on God and do the best we can, that’s all He asks. He will take care of the rest, even if we want to ourselves. It may not be obvious, but good comes out of all the bad and while yes, it’s hard to be a Christian, there are people who will go from those who mock, to those who believe in God.
Thanks for sharing this post! 🙂
Summer, Awesome, totally awesome. You are so right. Hurt from anybody is bad, but from other Christians does hurt worse, but…..how many times have I probably hurt another Christain and I have been the source of their intense pain. We can’t judge, we can only keep our eyes on God, knowing He loves us unconditionally and that is how we are to be to others. Blessings, love and hugs to you. Rochelle
This was so, so true, Summer. The whole Spiedi thing on I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here really ticked me off. I’m far from perfect, either, and I screw up all the time. Still, when people are so public about it and are so obnoxious and hypocritical it really is upsetting. I just think to myself, “No wonder people don’t want to be Christians.” You just put this so well, as usual. 🙂
Loved this post. Every word of it. You’re so talented!
You’re so right…I love the examples you used! And I love that you came to such a mature conclusion when so many people just give up. Well done missy!
I think those annoying people who talk about how amazingly Christian or religious they are the ones who are the least religious, at least in my book! The ones who will brag about how they have fasted for 40 days for Easter, yet go out and get smashed on Good Friday. Blah. I’d rather not hear about it. If you pray, pray. If you believe, you believe. You know? Great post, Summer. 🙂
This too weighs heavily on my mind and I have had this conversation with many of my friends.
Great post Summer. My husband grew up in the church but has since left because of the level hypocrisy amongst it’s members.
I am confused, did not grow up with religion in my life and searching for my own spirituality.
I am in agreement that people are not perfect and that your focus should be on yourself and on HIm and no one else. My hubs will get there one day. It is not about the people.
I love this post Summer! I am really glad that you included your realization- that we’re all human and we all fall short. Still we need to do our best to represent HIM. Great job!
Wonderful post Summer.
interesting and thought-provoking post!
We have to remember the bigger picture–we are here to learn and grow and try to become as much like Him as we can—and trials and temptations often lead us to make bad decisions that can have consequesnces on people other than ourselves. But that doesn’t mean God is any less loving and benevloent and REAL. Great post, Summer. It IS hard to stay faithful (AND non-judgemental) when other people act, well, stupid! (there’s my non-judging for ya! 😉 )
I’m all a shiver. This is beautiful and so true. And the two often go hand in hand wonderfully, don’t they? Truth and Beauty.
Amen! This is a wonderful post Summer with so much truth to it. Thank God that He is God and we are not!
Have a beautiful weekend, I’m off for a 4-day retreat!
Your words and feelings are so tender. It is difficult at times to live with the actions…or mis-actions…of others. I hope that they are just doing their best and may have misstepped. I hope that if I have done anything to hurt or disillusion anyone, that others forgive my mistakes. Just stay strong and remember the Lord and His abundant ability to forgive ALL of us!
I think that people are getting caught up on lables. We are all human no matter what back ground or belief and no one, NO ONE is perfect.
Get post. I like that way that you think.
I am right with you. One of the hardest things I’ve had to swallow from my ex or my husband’s ex is that they so so so Christian. Truly, they think they are going straight to heaven. But people who are GOOD don’t behave the way they do. It’s such a trip to have to deal with hypocritical people.
But what I’ve learned is that a lot of people use religion to make themselves FEEL like they are better, and not to actually BE better.
A lot of religion is cultural for so many people; they don’t think about what it MEANS.
And, as you said, people are people. Obviously, church isn’t a place for people who are already perfect.
Too bad it sometimes becomes a gathering place for people who THINK so. 🙂
It’s amazing to realize that God loves each of us, with our perspective, and takes what good HE can get from us and works with that.
I’m learning to be less judgmental, since I’m not the judge anyway, and more forgiving and understanding.
And to expect less from people (that really helps). 🙂
I love this post! Love it, love it love it love it…oh and did I say I love it!
I grew up Catholic but don’t practice any more …actually I don’t believe in religion or even God any more. And at first it was a sad realization.
I don’t think people need religion to be good people. I think humans inherently know how to be good without being told or because they fear hell. However, I don’t judge anyone for what they believe. It’s personal. But for me, it just doesn’t make any sense.
that said …I’m glad you found what you were looking for 🙂
I used to feel that way, too! Then I started looking inward and realized that I, like the apostle Paul, really am the chiefest of sinners. Not long after that, I realized that the “hypocrisy” charge that I lay at the feet of other Christians was an excuse for not committing myself as I should. In fact, after getting my own bearings straight, hypocrisy was suddenly a lot harder to find. That judge not thing, you know.
It’s really not about the followers. It’s about the Followed.
Preach it!
Hey, if I don’t happen to link up for Fashion Friday… will you add my link? It’s up, but I’m leaving town for a bachelorette party in the morning and won’t be back until sunday! Thanks lovey 🙂
Hey – you talkin’ to me?
Help! I’ve fallin’ and I can’t get up!
Seriously. I’m not ashamed to be a Christian, I’m ashamed of myself lately. And I’m ashamed to tell people I’m a Christian for fear they’ll look to me to relate to God. Does that make sense? I’m no ambassador of goodwill, lately.
Hey Summer, I just found this blog. I really admire you for getting this out there because there really are so many hypocritical Christians and it has always bugged me too. I try very hard to be a good example to others in that aspect, and it sucks sometimes to see other people bringing us down. Anyway, thanks!