Ever have those days where you feel you slightly resemble Joan Crawford, and there is really not much difference between you and her when she yells “NO WIRE HANGERS….EVER!!!!!”
But instead, you hear yourself yelling, “NO MORE WHINING….EVER!” or “NO, I DONT WANT TO TALK TO YOUR CARS ANYMORE!!!!” or “I JUST WANT TO POOP ALONE!!!! (okay, maybe that last one is just me….)
Ya, it’s been one of those, um, months for me. Just call me Mommy Dearest.
Honestly, I have to agree with a friend of mine who said, “Motherhood is a calling.”
Somedays I have it, most days I don’t.
I envy those of you who are able to stay at home, keep the house clean, have your laundry done, cook dinner from scratch, and somehow you don’t even know what an antidepressant is.
Who are you people? How do you live such lives?
I don’t mean to complain. I don’t. I love that I get to stay home and be with my kids. I do.
No really. I love my life, I love my life….
But…..
Sometimes the grass is greener on the other side, and today I want to be on the green. Just today I want to talk to an adult who simply says what they have to say and they say it once. And to be around the kind of people who know what I mean when I say, “Jason is such a great dad. I really hope he gets the right girl this time,” ahhh, I mean, that would be the life!
And just once, just once when I flush the toilet, it would be so nice not to hear, “Was it a big one or a small one, Mom?”
I know it’s weird, but I don’t want to talk to a car that doesn’t talk back to me. I don’t want to hear the same phrase 40 times in five minutes. And I’d like to be spoken to in a tone other than high pitched whining.
Oh crap. Wait, what’s this oh so familiar “mom feeling” coming over me right now?
Guilt. (Like we don’t feel that enough…)
Okay, okay….
To be honest, it’s me. It’s not him. I’m the one with issues and stuff.
He was sweet today. I mean, he stayed by my side from morning till night and yet still felt that he needed to tell me, “I miss you, Mom,” every ten minutes.
Bad, bad mom for complaining.
Just call me Mommy Dearest.
© 2009 “Le Musings of Moi”
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I adore this post!!!!!! You were talking for me!!!!! Except I say, I dont want to talk to you flippin’ plastic lizard anymore!!!
visiting from SITS!
Haha, that feeling is all too familiar sometimes! You put it so lovely, hehe 😉
Ya, those days are rough (and no, the bathroom thing is Unversal Mommydom). You need a girls night out!
Omg. Come over today. I drank half a bottle of wine last night for the very same reason. We can be guilty moms together!
Oh girl ,we have ALL been there even all of those great terrific stay-at-home-moms, there just good at hiding it.
This is exactly why I love your blog so much. YOU TELL IT LIKE IT IS. It’s so refreshing, and I know just what you mean. And, you’re not the only one who wants to pee alone. One of my very first posts is titled “Can’t a Girl Just Poop in Peace?” It’s about that very issue. Thanks for the good post, and quit beating yourself up.
It’s really all a fantasy isn’t it? The grass is always greener.
I am not a mommy yet, so I can only imagine the things that you are talking about…but man do you put it in such a great way. I do know that I was a snot nosed whining kid and my mom had the same moments but like you she loved me even when she wanted to strangle me 🙂 and run away. hahaha
Hope your wednesday is filled with rest and maybe a grown up conversation!
lol I catch myself wondering how I am going to handle not having a conversation with an adult.
Your a Good mom. Good moms always worry about being Bad Moms.
Omg, thank God I’m not alone!!!!!!!! LOL Great, great post! And I can relate to the bathroom story. I rarely get to go alone. lol
You took the words right out of my mouth! I wish I had the guts to post something like this. All my “working” friends are jealous of me and I am like are you nuts? Atleast you get to talk to co-workers and pee by yourself during the day. Staying home is the HARDEST most EMOTIONAL job EVER! But of course the most rewarding. Kinda like a double edge sword, huh?
I laughed my head off when I read about your bathroom woes. I think all mommies can relate and can I just add that I would LOVE to take a shower without an audience too? Even with my husband home, they all seem to be in the bathroom with me while I am trying to find some peace!
I love your blog…keep the posts a-coming!
Wowza! You are so in my head right now!!! I would LOVE to have a potty break all alone…My kids never want to talk to me unless I’m in the bathroom. The other day, I couldn’t get my son to answer me..I went in the bathroom and just stood there..30 seconds later, he comes bouncing along..NO JOKE! There must be some kind of alert system in these kids that goes off when a mom is in a bathroom! LOL!
Ha ha, I just posted about whinning. I so hear you. Great post and love the Joan Crawford visual…that is so me somedays.
“I’m NOT talking about food right now!!”
“I hear you, but I have things in my hands and you’re just gonna have to wait.”
“No you don’t need to watch a movie right now.”
“Can you guys just be nice to each other!?!
“NO FOOD! you just ATE!”
“I’m busy with this just wait a second.”
“I said no movie, now stop asking”
“Stop hitting each other!”
“You’re gonna have to wait for dinner, now ENOUGH and stop asking!”
“WAITASECOOOOONDDD!!”
“Turn that off I said NO!”
“BE NICE”
FUCK! CAN I HAVE A MOTHER FUCKING MOMENT!!!!!!
sigh.
A day in the life right?? I feel your pain. And yes…I think Jason will get it right this time.
Oh my, when did you move in? Is that you living under the pile of laundry, or in the over stuffed toy box. You totally could have been narrating how I have felt today. The cashier at Jo-anns Fabric called my 3 year old a “motormouth”. I was just like, “lady, that wasn’t even the tip of the iceburg”… I went to put the cart away and my 1 year old squealed cause she thought I was leaving her with Grammy. I love staying home, but I would love for one of those “do it all people” to move in with us. That would be the life. I love playing with the kids, though I would appreciate some lone potty time also. I could also do without the look from hubs that says “gee, did you do ANYTHING today?” To which I would answer yes, vacuumed 4 times, cleaned up dog throw up (from our mastiff puppy, not a small feat) cleared off the table, did the dishes, did 2 loads of laundry, changed sheets and made 2 meals and 2 snacks. But can he actually see much of that, nope, just what I didnt do….
So I say, cheers to you, bottoms up!
Great post!
Just so you know…some of us working moms think the grass is greener on the other side, too. 😉
I have always loved being a stay-at-home mom but trust me, I’m not the one who has the perfectly organized home with a well-balanced meal on the table every night. I don’t know who those people are either.
YOU.ARE.SO.NOT.ALONE. Maybe our kids have been conspiring together? I love this post, sorry you’re going through the same thing but glad you’re keeping it real. It makes us all feel human! I’ve done a few posts about this – LOL – yep – its been one of those months. I am SO ready for Spring and ready for it to not be 12 degrees outside!
Well put! I used to be the mom that had everyting looking great downstairs and dinner on the table each night (only the upstairs was very messy!) now with boy number 3 here it is too hectic to clean and or get dinner on the table! My kids drive me nuts too. Oh and the whole bathroom thing, try adding two weiner dogs to the mix – when my kids finally get the clue to leave me alone the dogs start sticking their noses under the door and sniffing…no peace for Mom even while pooping. I actually look at my part time job as a vacation, I love it! haha
I hope the grass is nice and green for you tomorrow!
LOL…we all feel like Mommy Dearest sometimes! There is a book out there in Amazon land…I think it’s out of print…but it’s called Dragon Mom – find it – read it – you will feel better 🙂
oh gracious, that was just the laugh i needed! love your sense of humor about the whole mommy thing… thanks for sharing! (ps- found your blog while hopping around…)
Are you trying to say there are people out there somewhere who actually go to the bathroom ALONE? That’s a novel idea!
Ohhhhhh Girl.
I need a string attached to all the words I say while in Mommy Dearest Mode so that when I do say them, I can pull them back in!
I have found that even on my most Mommy Dearest days (geez, I am gonna sound like such a cliche!) that the kids often still think it was a Dearest Mommy Day. (Should I write for Hallmark?)
Hang in there! And remember to live for Tuesdays and Thursdays! 🙂
I know how you feel X4! I have 4 kids all under 4 and life defintly gets a little crazy!
I don’t have kids but I feel this way towards the world sometimes. Every smart super-mom will tell you to take me time. Just like you I need me time too and today I’m taking it and I feel like someone out there understands how I feel.
(I went crazy on my boyfriend yesterday about him and his family(so demanding) I found myself saying LEAVE ME ALONE!!! It’s so normal what you are feeling (and it’s obvious you have HUGE expectations of yourself, which I do too) so I will not believe for a minute that you are Mommy dearest, I am sure you are a wonderful mommy (even though you are hard on yourself). You just need a timeout, not for bad behavior but for sanity. 😉
Thanks for helping me not feel so alone today.