ive lost that lovin’ feeling, days 21 & 22

It’s the weekend.
And let me tell you, the weekends are the WORST for me.  
And I think I have short timers syndrome.
You know when you give your two weeks notice at a job, and then feel like slacking because you’re almost done anyways?
That’s me.
I feel like slacking.
I HAVEN’T, but I FEEL like it.
I have ALL kinds of justifications running through my mind…..and during the week it’s no problem to shoo those away.  
During the weekend?
I need bolted doors.
I’m not a fan of beans either, and most of my day consists of them.
So that’s not helping in the slightest.
Not to mention I have the looming “cleanse” coming up, and I’m still on the fence as to what to do about that.
Having tried each recipe once before and gagging into the first bite of most, I wonder how I’ll make it through 5 days.
But, I can’t help but wonder if my taste buds have changed enough to be able to tolerate it now.
And then I wonder if I NEED to do the cleanse, being that I’m in my pants now.
{even though my front butt has a LONG way to go…not even sure Tracy can solve that ab separation problem….might have to save up for surgery}  
I mean, maybe I only need a 25 day boot camp, and Tracy just doesn’t know because she doesn’t know me and my body.
Maybe she’d actually tell me to eat in moderation and keep up with the workouts then continue to be amazed.
But then there’s the whole “obeying ALL of Tracy’s 30 Day Method RULES” goal that I set in the beginning, and how un-proud would mama tracy be if I failed now?
Although, is it really failing if I make it 25 days?
And what if I do the 30 full days of the workout, but not the full 30 of the diet?
Or what if I skip the cleanse but do the first week’s menu again instead?
Would everyone be so bummed by me?
Would I be weak?
{would I be classified as a major DRAMA queen right about now?!?}
Do you see this???
Are you seeing the thought torture I am going through?
Talk me through this.  I need you guys and your wisdom now. =)
{don’t be afraid of the comment section, this is the time to USE it!}
Now, let’s get this update out of the way….
It’s fine.  Most of it anyway.  Still NO CHEATING and no going off the menu!  21 days clean. 
And while I’m tired of having to eat what I’m told, surprisingly I’m not craving junk food.  
I just miss eating what I “feel” like eating.
ya know?
I know, I’ll work it out in therapy. 
Started the LAST sequence yesterday (30 reps of everything, and twice through arms) and oh ma word!!!
It was torture and amazing all at once.
I couldn’t believe how insanely hard it was after having worked out out for 21 days straight!  
Amazingly, I was energized for 40 minutes of the 2008 Cardio afterwards, which I LOVE!  
I could never get sick of that video.
Then this morning I realized what Tracy meant when she said this would be the sequence that would BOLT all your muscles together.
I literally felt BOLTED!
While the diet part is still a struggle for me, showing up and doing the workouts is something I love and never dread.  I am addicted to that kind of a challenge, and I love the pain.
Tracy is right, you start to crave it a bit.
Ya ya ya, Tracy is right.

Also, I started my own facebook page dedicated simply for the 30 Day Method boot camp updates and progress….where I’ll be posting result pictures that all the world doesn’t need to see on le blog.

here’s a glimpse of today’s results:


Be back tomorrow with some clarity, I hope!
Off to bolt those muscles!!!

{just a passing thought…do we tend to be harder on ourselves when we’re more in shape than when we’re softer and rounder?  i feel like I’m scrutinizing WAY more than a few months ago….i can only imagine what i’d be doing if i was on the scale!}
© 2010 “Le Musings of Moi”
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tracy andersons 30 day method, day 20!!!

I canNOT believe that I have 10 days left.  A week and a half.  Two more weekends….
wait, that last one doesn’t make me feel better.
{the weekends can SUCK it right now.}
But a week and a half?!?  
I can so TOTALLY do that.
What’s crazy is that I thought for sure this whole deal would be in the bag for me by now.  
Ya.  Nnnnnot really.
Can I tell you how many times I’ve wanted to quit?
Actually too many to count.
Do you have any idea how many times I’ve thought, “eh, it’s good enough….who needs to be ALL the way to their goals anyway?”
Waaaaaaaaay too many, that’s how many.
But, thankfully I have Jimmy & Bethany on my team, because they are always there to keep me from throwing in the towel.
{my 30 day partner in crime}
{my hottie husband, who keeps me from running after the pizza guy}
Once I saw this show on Dateline or something, that was about a young morbidly obese girl who had a syndrome that caused her to NEVER feel full….and they showed this scene of an ice cream truck going by, and then panned to her front door which had BOLT after BOLT after BOLT on it….and then they quickly zoomed in to her going absolutely BANANAS because she couldn’t get to the ice cream she so desperately needed.
It was amazing and sad and years later I still can’t get that scene out of my head.
Know why?
Oh, I don’t know….maybe because I AM THAT GIRL?!?
And actually I WAS THAT GIRL last weekend when I was in the throws of PMS, and if there had been a pizza delivery truck driving by, Lord help me.
Jimmy told me today that I was out of control.
I was.
I wanted to go BANANAS just like my sister in food on Dateline.
Oprah God Moment in 5, 4, 3, 2, …..
I overcame the insane urge to eat like a mad woman, and while I wasn’t happy about it AT ALL in the moment….the next morning I was feeling all kinds of powerful, you have NO idea.
Instead of that icky feeling of “oh why did i just eat that, i’m so weak, what’s wrong with me?” stuff we put ourselves through, I was all, “oh i am SO glad i didn’t go eat that, i’m so human, and well….obviously there’s something wrong with me…”
My point is.
When you have a goal, diet or otherwise, BOLT YOUR DOORS to keep you from failing.
Or get a husband (just run and grab one really quick, it’s only for 30 days) or a friend that will be willing to SIT ON YOU to keep you from failing.
OR get BOLTS, A HUSBAND, and a FRIEND….then you’ll be sure to have success.
And success, you guys, is where you find your inner fierce.
{we’re always searching for the inner fierce in our fam….}
Don’t you worry, I’m saving up all my pretty little tips for the end where you can find them all in one place.  I like to keep my wisdom organized.  
So let’s ~update~ shall we?
Today went great.  
Loved the spinach omelet, especially because of all the love my sweet Bethany put into it.  
It was ‘specially yummy this morning.  
Just another thing I am loving about these 30 days?  
My morning healthy breakfasts sitting at Bethany’s table chatting.  
With her crazy life with 3 boys, and my INSANE last year with 2 kids + foster child…..we’ve not had the bonding time I’ve been missing.  
So this DEFINITELY makes up for it.  
And I love her.  
And her omelets.  
Snack was an apple with peanut butter, which was almost like chocolate.  Ah-mah-zing.  
My kale tofu chicken soup was good but bland, but that was my fault for forgetting to spice it up with cracked pepper.  
What’s really weird is that I get a little giddy about Kale.
That’s weird, right?
I’m even excited to start making Kale Chips.
And the Kale juice for tomorrow….makes. my. mouth. water.
I’ve lost it, I know.
It used to be about shoes (is still is!) and fashion (later tomorrow!) and home decor (right before this post!)…and as I recall a lot about why did I want to parent again…..and now I’m talking about kale.
yawn, right?
And then yawn some more cause I have to finish the update.
Veggie Burgers
was what it was SUPPOSED to look like.  
And in fact, did look like, until you tried to pick them up.  
And then all you had was a bunch of ingredients. 
But, sticking to the rules and all, I was going to get those blasted things down.
Enter the Romaine Hearts.  
Opened up those babies, scooped some “burger” inside, and WA LA!
You have a lettuce wrap that reminded me of something I’d eat at PF Changs.  
It was kind of amazing actually.
{this is what kind of amazing actually looks like}
Finished the second sequence with a bang.
A bang that did NOT involve ankle weights.
Seriously, that was the one workout that kept on giving!
The better I became at it, the more unique places I’d find that would end up sore.
But 40 reps I did, and then followed with 40 min of trampoline dancing OUTSIDE in 80 degree weather!
SoCal rocks.
{back to real dancing tomorrow…just needed a change}
Tomorrow, I begin the final sequence that will BOLT all my muscles together…
Fabulous, Tracy, looking forward to the bolting….
Let day 21 begin!

{to follow along the whole fun journey from day 1: click here}

© 2010 “Le Musings of Moi”
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2 sizes & sweet potato pancakes, day 19!

I found new motivation this morning when the bloat from PMS finally took a hike! 
What is that bloat all about anyway???  
And what is in those monthly hormones that FORCE you to eat a few extra chocolate chips on top of the already chocolatey dessert you’re making???
Seriously, I was forced.  
I protested and tried to run, and yet they STILL found their way into my mouth.
But, like Bethany reminded me….it WAS on the menu, and Tracy DOESN’T control portions….so….
She’s a good friend, my Bethany.  
Always speaking the truth in love.
And since we’re talking of PMS and all that it brings….
You should know that I’ve always been an emotional eater…so this change of eating has been kind of an awakening in that I have all these emotions that I have to actually FACE and SOLVE, rather than simply SOLVING by STUFFING my FACE!
Weird stuff how this diet is making me grow up in all kinds of ways I didn’t expect.
Anyway, all that is behind me (not the growing up part)….
PMS is dead and done for another 15ish days, and it is now absolutely clear to me that I am not about to birth a child in a few weeks!!!
Jimmy even did a double take last night and exclaimed, 
“Woah! I can REALLY tell a difference with your stomach!  Now that you’re not pms’ing, it’s TOTALLY gone down.  You’re tiny!”
Thanks babe.
{just wondering how he’d feel if I said that, say…about something on his anatomy.  just sayin’}
I’m even noticing that my skin tone is even getting better on the tum tum, bum bum, and my arm arms!!!  {sorry, no cute word for arm}
I’m super happy so far with the results EVEN without knowing my weight or weight loss.
I know I have gone down almost two sizes in two and a half weeks, I know that I am eating healthier than I have ever been in my life, and I’m even cooking….that is truly enough for me!
Still going strong with not ONE day off.  
One more day after day for this second sequence, and I’m still feeling the burn with 40 reps!
Crazy how this is the sequence that just keeps on giving….
Maybe tomorrow I’ll add ankle weights to go out with a bang!
For cardio I’ve been doing a solid 40 minutes of DANCING with no shin pain!!!
{did “research” on how to solve shin splints that WORK!  I’ll share tomorrow.}
19 days, and not a morsel off the menu.  
I have had to switch a couple of things….such as the lamb meal, and anything with beets or tofu.  
If it has beets, I simply drop out the beets and eat the rest.  
If it has tofu, I replace with chicken.  
Other than that, NO CHANGES and NO CHEATING!!!  
Not even a cup of coffee.
Although, don’t praise me.
I never drink coffee.
I did drink Diet Heaven Coke, and I’m 19 days clean of that, so that deserves a gift certificate to go shopping I’d say.
I’m still trying to decide what to do about the cleanse….Zoe, from the facebook page, suggested not pureeing the foods and simply eating them whole instead.  
I may do that if buying a food scale doesn’t break the bank, since I’d then have to weigh out the food.
It’s only for a few days….I’m sure it’ll be fine.
Now the BIG question.
Do I weigh in when all is said and done and 30 days are over?
Anyway, my sisters sister in law (you follow?) wanted to give those sweet potato pancakes a shot, so I wanted to share the recipe in case there was anyone else that was brave enough to attempt heaven.  
{remember that I have been eating clean for 19 days, so heaven to me may be different to you.}
Sweet Potato Silver Dollar Pancakes
1 egg white, whisked
2 tablespoons kefir (found in health food aisle)
2 tablespoons flaxseeds
1 steamed sweet potato, mashed and cooled
Olive oil spray
3 tablespoons of yacon syrup (i couldn’t find this, but you can substitute with honey or agave)
{heather, you will love this since you don’t like maple syrup!}
Mix the egg white, kefir, and flaxseeds with the potato.  Using a tablespoon, form the mixture into small pancakes.  Coat a griddle with olive oil spray and set it over medium heat; place the pancakes on the griddle.  Cook for approximately 1 minute on each side, flipping with a spatula.  Pay attention when making these, as they can burn easily!  They’re best when served immediately.  Serve with the syrup.
© 2010 “Le Musings of Moi”
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wont you take me to…funkytown? day 18

That peppy girl who said it was all DOWNHILL from here?
She can stuff it.


PMS said so.
Pretty sure that’s what my PMS would look like, if I didn’t have Tracy to answer to.

Instead I’m scowering craigslist for a killer deal, because shopping has to help me avoid my emotions even better than junk food.

tree of life, flowers for the kids, birds for my grandparents & dad....words for my soul.

{He will bring beauty from my pain….holding onto my life quote, holding on)

I mean, woah.
Gotta keep holding on….falling forward…towards growth and change.
I want to do this.
No one is Making Me.
Tracy, though in my dreams it’s different, doesn’t even know who I am…
sniff sniff.
So this is JUST ABOUT ME.
{and you, of course to help you….please hoping this helps you!}
So, today included some choco-blueberry pudding, and a few stray chocolate chips *may* have landed in my mouth in the process of making it.
I am weak.
I’m perplexed, people.
Perplexed about the cleanse portion of these 30 days.
And this is why.
I once attempted to do the weeks cleanse back a couple of months ago before a vacation.
I made and pureed ALL the meals (meaning 4oz) for the first few days and was ready and roaring to go.
Emily and I even teamed up for support.
Guess how far I got?
Oh, ummmm…the first day.
It’s those dang pureed foods!  
I just cannot seem to get them down without them wanting to come RIGHT back up.
Tomato Gaspacho, gag!
Corn pudding, retch!
Edemame mush, what?
Obvy, I can make an exception for the kiwi dessert and the chocolate pudding…but I’m pretty sure I can’t just keep repeating those all day in order to get the same results.  
pretty sure, I can’t.
And this is where it would be great to have a direct line to Tracy.
Ya know, like we sometimes wish we had to God?
Like when we have something really important to decide, and if only God (or Tracy) would just answer us directly, we would have NO DOUBTS as to which path to take?
Yup, I’m there.
Knowing I CANNOT do the 5 day cleanse portion of this diet, do I:
a. do the first week of the diet over again to complete 30 days?
b. eat pizza and call it a deal on day 25?
c. wait for tracy to call me directly, and take her advice when that happens?

Speaking of Tracy….on a TOTAL UnRELATED note….

Did I mention when I dance, I pretend I’m auditioning for Tracy?  
It’s like when I was little when I used to just stop what I was doing when I was playing and look up and smile. 
Because maybe, just maybe, I was on a sitcom somewhere and this was my introduction moment to the show.
You know, right?
You TOTALLY did that too.
Okay then….neither did I.
Totally kidding.
Ummmmm…..anyway….back to Tracy.  
Yes, my dream, (it was martin luther king day and all), is to commute to Tracy in LA and wow her with my knowledge of the method, shut her down with my moves, and then casually accept her generous offer to work alongside her other incredible trainers.
OH YA, sending THAT ONE out to my Jesus.  
{jesus, you got that?}
Can you hear it now?
Summer…..Tracy Anderson Trainer to the REAL people.
{she can have the stars, I want YOU!}
I have a dream…..
But I gotta wake up at the moment and get to making soup and salmon for my day instead.
Day 18, moving forward….


Now about YOU GUYS!

Bethany and I are going to be Making a Video for ya’ll.
What do you want to see or hear?
Mat moves?

You tell us, and we WILL DELIVER…we only live to serve the ones who are along with us in these wild and crazy days that WILL NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.

© 2010 “Le Musings of Moi”
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monday muse fashion & days 16 & 17

It’s been awhile since I’ve done a Monday muse….but now that I am starting to fit back into my clothes, I figured it was definitely time.
tunic: thrifted
skinny jeans: Ross
boots: Ross
blazer: f21
necklace: thrifted
purse: tj maxx
sunnies: f21
So, the clean eating is still going well and totally on track.  I am now 17 days “clean” of sugar (except those chocolate chips we get once a week!) and processed foods!!!  
I have not cheated one day or gone off mama Tracy’s diet in any way.
{although I did switch out the lamb meal, wasn’t having that….poor sweet little lamb}
I have not missed a day of working out, and every day includes the full mat workout (yesterday & today, 40 reps of everything) AND at least 30 minutes of cardio.
{usually 40 if my kids are actually sleeping}
I have SO much more energy, I FEEL so much cleaner and leaner, and while I still have some body stuff that may or not be solved in these last two weeks….I feel totally okay with that.
It just feels amazing to be healthy again.
And I’m kind of excited that a few of my pants fit again.  =)
Keepin’ it real people, keepin’ it real.
{p.s. made these amazing sweet potato flaxseed kefir type pancake things this morning that were AMAZING.  did you catch that?  I MADE!  all by myself!  AND they were GOOD!  topped with a little agave and there you are, in heaven.  on a clean eating diet in heaven.}
© 2010 “Le Musings of Moi”
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picture time! day 15!!!

Before I begin with the changes….I want to address something, because I want to be clear about my use of the words “fat” and “chub.”  
Some people haven’t been too happy with me on said adjectives and it causes me sleepless nights when I’ve upset even a stranger.
I know I’m not, nor have I ever been considered (or considered myself) FAT.
But, I do HAVE fat, or as I call it, chub…
And in the span of three months, I gained something that was definitely not muscle (chub perhaps?) so that not a single pair of my pants would fit, and I felt completely uncomfortable in my own skin.  
So maybe I wasn’t fat, but I was not where it’s comfortable for me, and I felt that I needed something drastic to get me out of the horrible eating take out and sweets habits I had found myself in.
I will do my best not to use the term “fat” but please allow me the adjective “chub,” because if you had seen my belly (no I won’t show you!), then you would understand.
Now let’s move on, because I’m feeling a tad uncomfortable and awkward here.
Today was the big day.  HALFWAY DONE!
So this morning after breakfast, I went to the pms pants.
The pants I love and keep because even when they are too big for me, I simply cinch them up with a belt and wear them with a tunic…
I found them at a thrift store years ago, and we’ve been together ever since….and will be forever more.
So before Halloween when I was eating well and staying consistent with the TAM,
they would slide off me.
But then by Christmas….I couldn’t even button them.
This should give you an idea of my before, because I sure as heck am not posting THOSE pictures.
I have some self dignity.
Or pride…whatever.
And while they fit now, and are a tad big, they certainly aren’t sliding off….
which is where I am hoping them to be in another 2 weeks.
{i totally blame pms}
I felt a little blue after that, I have to admit.
I KNOW I have unrealistic expectations to think that I’d lose three months of weight in two weeks, but a girl can dream.
After a big ol’ speech from Jimmy reminding me to focus ON THE POSITIVE (they did fit!) and to not be so hard on myself (no one need criticize me, i do just fine myself, thanks), I felt somewhat better.
And then I remembered I had ONE more pair of pants.  
My super chub day pants!!!  
The only pair of pants that would button at the end of my three months of freedom eating.
I quickly swapped the big for the super big, and wa la.  
I found my smile.
They were huge on me.
My biggest pair of pants were too big.
And at Christmas they fit just right.
People that is less than a month ago!!!!

{sometimes it’s more about the pants, i’m just sayin’}

Tracy, wanna make out?
As for my arms, when they are bent like this:
I’m like, ya….I see the change.
But when they’re down by my side relaxed, mmmm….nasomuch….but I know it’s in due time.
I have the “lindley” working against me, and that’s quite a force to be reckoned with.
So, ya, big changes!!!
I’m holding out hope for more toning and if that skin stuff wants to work itself out, I’d be mighty fine with that as well.
I love my kids, but man….
Upped my reps to 35 of legs and 40 for abs and arms.
And then after a lot of care of my shins in the last 24 hours, I was able to finish Dance Cardio I.  
All is well and good and I am still completely on track, never once cheating or going off the menu.  
I did switch out the tofu (ick!) for chicken at lunch….as I HAVE tried tofu before and it will never happen again.
Not even for Tracy.
15 days down my friends!!!
It’s a piece of cake from here, right?
{mmmmm….cake….white cake with chocolate frosting…or maybe just the frosting….on a spoon….}
© 2010 “Le Musings of Moi”
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i can see the end! days 13 & 14

House projects seem to be taking priority over blogging…I’m actively getting ready to finish the kids wing of the house, and this weekend we’re attempting the hallway.

I have visions of black and cream stripes (black being chalkboard paint), hooks, and a gallery of the kids art….
It looks SO good in my brain, and in my inspiration pictures, so I’m excited to get it done!!!
Hopefully Monday I’ll have some pictures to share.

Now, for those of you checking in to get motivated to begin doing the 30 Day Method (or are keeping up doing it with me!), I wanted to get everyone up to date!


Yesterday, Day 13, I was still a bit sore…so I stuck with 30 reps of everything including arms.  
Then I followed it all up with 40 minutes of trampoline dancing.

Today, Day 14, I upped the reps (yowza) to 35 of everything, and then I attempted a plethora of things for cardio.  
First I went outside and “treadmill” danced for 10 min…then I came in and tried to do cardio dance from the book for a few (got bored), and then transitioned into the 2008 video (all low impact style)…
for a total for 30 min, and all I can say is….
Low impact dance can suck it.
But after spending 40 minutes on attempted cardio, it was time to call it a day.
All I can say is THANK YOU JESUS that last week is coming to an end.  
My goodness that was a lot of fish to get through…not to mention, I discovered a few more things to add to my NEVER EAT AGAIN list.
We now have:
“bloody mary”
roasted root veggies
and now….
carrot ginger soup
It was awful.  
Like eating soap awful.
One of my best friends came over later in the day, and gobbled up half a bowl moaning about how delightful it was.
Say what?
Not me.  I just couldn’t get it all down.  Blech.  
Instead, I took Tracy’s advice (if you have STRONG taste aversions, choose something else from the menu), and so I did.  
I had a small apple with a spoonful of peanut butter.  And it was DE-LIGHTFUL.

Also, the tilapia recipe for todays lunch?
And that flank steak tonight?
Both of those recipes will most certainly be added into our routine once this is over.
I could BATHE in dijon, it’s just so major.

And now with Day 14 winding to a close, still with NO CHEATING and all by Tracy’s rules, I’m prepping myself to try on jeans tomorrow.
So scared.
So many what ifs….
And even if they don’t button yet, I will hold out hope that amazing things will happen in the next 15 days.
I’ll also blame PMS….because even if it’s not PMS, it still always get the blame.
{kind of like the middle child, but i’ll save that for therapy.}

Not to mention, I feel GREAT and HEALTHY and am kind of majorly proud that I’ve lasted this long.
{I’m such a good obey-er….aren’t you proud mama tracy?}
Really, that’s what it’s all about, right?  Being HAPPY and HEALTHY?
Blah blah blah…
those dang jeans better button is I gotta say.

So with tomorrow being DAY 15, I have to admit it’s felt like an uphill battle to get here but I have a feeling it’s all gonna be downhill to the end.
I pickin’ up steam people, and I now have NO DOUBT I can do it.

I’m determined, I’m tough, and one of you even says I’m fierce….so…

{hangin’ tough, are you tough enough?!?}

Pictures tomorrow!
© 2010 “Le Musings of Moi”
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lets talk about hunger, day 12

Ya, so yesterday?
Mommy Dearest made an appearance and there was just no reason to bring her to the blog.
Jimmy actually came home late from work, and then went to the grocery store after the kids were in bed…
and I’m quite sure it had something to do with escaping me.
I think the root vegetables for lunch had a lot to do with my mood.
ALWAYS pass the blame.
{then add in a moody 5 year old and a three day napless 2 year old, and out comes mommy dearest}
While Bethany didn’t have too much trouble with lunch, I on the other hand, got about halfway through before I felt them stuck in my throat ready to make their way back up.
There wasn’t enough water in the world to get the rest of them down.
I gotta say, MOST of this food has been surprisingly good, but some of it, nasomuch.  
What’s funny is the stuff that I gag on, Bethany likes….and stuff she’s not too impressed with, I can’t get enough of.
There are a few things we agree on, and that would be anything related to fruit or chocolate.  
No surprise there, right?
So really, I think it’s all a matter of your taste…BUT let me just remind you….I am THE pickiest eater alive, and there was a TON of stuff on the menu that I was SURE I wouldn’t like.  
But, I stuck to my rules to at least TRY everything…and I surprised myself in that I liked a lot more than I had thought.
{ruling out beets though fo’ sho’}
Keep that in mind when you’re doing this, or if you think you CAN’T do this but want to…
you will absolutely surprise yourself, I promise.
And you may actually find yourself in an elevator with a stranger desperately wanting to share with them that you tried Tilapia and that you liked it…
or if you’re like me, you’ll just post it on Facebook.
Because sometimes we need a little affirmation.
We meaning YOU, and certainly not me.
{who’s the one blogging the experience….ummmm}
So, now that I’m almost halfway through, I consider myself somewhat of an expert and have figured a few things out…and I am more than happy to pass on such wisdom.
Let’s talk about HUNGER.
The calories are low.  
Fact, plain and simple.  
While I have NO DOUBT I are getting ALL the nutrients I could ever need (or want), I’m not quite as sure about the calories.  
Tracy says in the book that she doesn’t control your portions so they can be adjusted (up, never down, trust me!), but to keep in mind that your large tummy is used to being overstuffed and not to trust it so much in the beginning.  
I kept that in the back of my head always, but now that we’re about halfway through, I think my stomach has definitely shrunk and now when I feel hunger….I really believe it’s actually hunger.  
{I think I have Jimmy and the kids convinced it’s more of me being possessed, but trust me, hunger/possession….kind of one in the same}
WHEN this happens, and it WILL, let me (the expert) say that with all the exercise you are doing according to the book, up your portions a tad.  
I mean, obviously don’t go eat cookies and pizza and crackers (mmmmm, yum), 
BUT do have extra veggies, fruit, or fish…
whatever happens to be on the days menu, have a little more of it.
You will feel AMAZING and better prepared to finish the 30 days up with a bang.
You won’t gain weight.
You won’t add on cellulite or rolls….
{mmm, rolls…those sound good.  with butter….mmmm}
I mean, who has ever gotten fat from kale, fruit, and tilapia?
Ya, you see?
And if you don’t believe me, believe Tracy.
There is a reason she put that little nugget in the book.
LOVING the second sequence and totally okay with the soreness that comes with it.
So when I said 30 reps the first day was easy and all…
I had no idea what was to come the next morning.
So yesterday, day 12, I kept it once again at 30, and found it increasingly harder!
I think because I was focusing more on form, not to mention I was most definitely working against tired muscles.
Cardio was 40 minutes on the trampoline.
My shins are starting to feel SO much better, but I think I’m going to hold off on dancing until the weekend to be sure.
Btw, if you stay focused, it is possible to finish in an hour forty five….
unless you’ve had a kid or more…
then you have to add in the pee breaks.
OR you could wear depends….
always an option.
I mean, for you.
Not for me.
Cooking is becoming something I don’t mind, so that’s kind of Mah-Jor.
In fact, I may start cooking a few times a week when this is all over.
And when I say “cooking” I mean helping Jimmy prepare meals.
I’m not THAT changed.
I do quite like that I’m craving processed foods less, and enjoying fresh whole foods instead.
That feels oh so grown up and all.
I feel like I have a better grasp of portions and sizing….
BUT, I am super excited to eat whole grains again.
In MODERATION, of course.
{cause I’m sure Tracy is reading this.}
Anyway, today is DAY 13, and after having breakfast with Bethany (yes, omelets again), I feel so much better prepared to move forward.
Saturday, day 15, I’ll be taking pictures AND trying on my jeans.  
Fat ones and skinny ones.
It’s time to check the progress.
I will say, I am DEFINITELY noticing smaller thighs, a flatter tummy, and the biceps and triceps are totally poppin’!
Watch out Gwenyth.
AS ALWAYS, my heart swells for all you supporting me and encouraging me EVEN though some of you think I’m insane.
I guess there may be some truth to that anyway…
{and I’ll address some of your comments, questions, concerns tomorrow}
we’re also prepping to paint and do some decorating in le house, so stay tuned for updated pictures!!!
© 2010 “Le Musings of Moi”
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weighing in on weighing, day 11!

Today was amazing.
Choco-blueberry pudding day!!!
So sweet, so yummy, so right on time for my tastebuds.
Also yummy?
The salmon omelet this morning.
And of course, I went to Bethany’s because she is the professional.
Isn’t she gorgeous?
So this morning over breakfast, we got on the topic of weighing ourselves.  Especially since Tracy just made the comment on Laura Bermens show that we should be weighing ourselves every day.
Bethany was telling me that in the beginning of this diet, 
(she’s doing the diet by the rules too, but has only been doing the workout every other day), 
she was weighing in every day and it was definitely motivating and exciting to see the numbers drop.
But then they started to stay the same, and because some of us girls aren’t so secure with the scale, her motivation dropped….and her thought process became,
“WHAT?!?  No drop?  After all this big of a change in my eating, and nothing?!?  What am I doing all this for then?!?”
Whereas, if she had ignored the scale and simply paid attention to the change in the mirror, she would have been happy as a clam and motivated beyond belief.
I don’t mean to make this my soapbox or go against what Tracy has said, (she has her reasons, I’m sure), but I just feel that everything should be in moderation. 
Once again I’ll say, if you can handle the scale every day WITHOUT dread, WITHOUT obsessing the rest of the day, WITHOUT having it determine your happiness, then by all means…  
Weigh away.
But, if you’re not there yet in your strength, then you need to do what is best for you.  
Once a week, once a month, never…..whatever it may be, DO WHAT IS BEST FOR YOU!
Most of you know my story, my struggles, and how when I began to let go of the numbers, I finally found some healing and strength.  I’m telling you, it was LIFE CHANGING for me.  
Hence, the soapbox.
Bethany asked if I was going to weigh in when the 30 days were up, and honestly I didn’t know the answer.
My fear is that I’ll look in the mirror, or try on my clothes and be totally happy and satisfied….but then what happens if I stand on the scale and it doesn’t flash the number that in my head means total safety, security & happiness?  
Will I then think, “Are you kidding me?  30 days of boot camp and I’m not even at my goal weight?!?  What did I do all that for then?”  
And then what happens after those thoughts?
A pizza and some chocolate for comfort, that’s what happens.
A lot of last night my heart felt a bit heavy and I couldn’t quite figure out why….but then as my thoughts drifted to a year ago, of how much of my thought life was spent obsessing over numbers and body shape, and how much that took away from family, friends, life, and improving it….
I then realized where the yuck feeling was coming from.
I have to be careful not to allow dieting, getting into shape, having a “perfect” body, and all that comes with it, to become a little mini god.  
There is SO much more to life.
So much more that my thoughts and hearts should be focused on.

I honestly believe God really put all of that on my heart last night, to remind me.
Of where I’ve been, and what I’m striving for.
All in all, I felt Him reminding me not to forget that when I get to heaven one day, He won’t be asking me what I weighed.
Okay then…
Sermon over.
My goodness.
~30 day method update~
Today’s menu was absolutely delightful, from beginning to end….I wasn’t ever hungry, and I absolutely loved every bite.
{that salad with cranberries, oh. my. word.}
At this point, I guess I don’t need to keep saying I haven’t cheated, maybe instead I’ll share if I do cheat.  Which just won’t happen.
I have NO doubts about that anymore.
Today was the first day of the second sequence, which was super fun.  It took a bit longer because I wanted to watch every movement of hers to make sure I was doing it in proper form.  I decided to do 30 reps of everything today, which wasn’t too hard (although my muscles felt exhausted later in the day!), so tomorrow I will be upping it to 35.  
As for the arms, I did 7 minutes to my own music, which I’m finding is the most fun for me.
But when it came to cardio, today was the first day where it just wasn’t happening for me.  
My left shin, along the inside of it, is still hurting…(guess my air max’s aren’t so amazing for shin splints after all)…
I started with 5 minutes on the trampoline, and didn’t have an ounce of umph.  
Then I put on the book cardio for five minutes….still nothing.  
So I thought I would try to go outside and “treadmill dance” in my driveway.  
Nope, nada, nothing.  
Finally I decided to take a break and come back to it later.  
After I ate lunch and picked up Tay from school, I had a new found energy.  
I think it also helped to vent to Bethany about the mama issues re: jumping (so not cool!), 
and then of course the quick call to Jimmy where he told me i couldn’t fail now, 
was all I needed to get home and get busy.
So, I turned on Novaspace on Pandora, and followed along with Tracy on the trampoline.
I know that she recommends dancing above any other cardio, but until my shin heals, that just isn’t an option.
Not too excited about roasted root vegetables and ginger carrot soup the next two days for lunch, but what can ya do?
Hold onto the memory of choc-blueberry pudding that’s what.
Day 11, DONE!
© 2010 “Le Musings of Moi”
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chub hiding fashion, day 10!

and trying to find my inner fierce….
{mmm, not quite….}
{there we go!}
Before I talk about fashion, let me be clear that as soon as these pictures were taken, I trimmed my bangs.
Didn’t want you to worry.
Moving on.
So this is my secret on how I hide the chub.
The rolls.
The flab.
Whatever you wanna call it.
Keep it cute, but keep it loose, especially around the trouble areas.
Mine happen to be my thighs, tum tum, and arms.
We have what we call the “lindley” arms on my mom’s side of the family.
And so far Tracy is the only one coming between me and my “lindley.”
These pants have been with me for years and years…
through two pregnancies, 
through 30+ pounds gained and lost, 
and no matter what size I’ve been…
they always fit.
I don’t care if they showed up on the DO NOT WEAR list in US Weekly, 
they would still grace my body, 
and I would love them no less.
Now, obviously I can’t wear these EVERY day, 
but every other works out quite nicely.
As for the shirt, I love it so because it has lots of fabric around the arms, thus eliminating anyone from being waved at by my underarms.
Not to mention, I happen to think it’s totally adorable.
Pair it with a pop of color, funky leopard shoes, and my fave chunky necklace from World Market and wa la.  
An outfit that’s comfy, cozy, cute and totally hiding all my danger zones.
Another trick I use when I feel less than fit, is the tunic/jeans or legging look.
Something like this:
or this:
{with a leopard jacket over it}
So you see, hiding chub and having style is something that can be done.
And should be done.
Because it makes you feel SO much better.
Says the girl in her husbands white hanes t-shirt and drawstring sweats.
Going strong, still!
{no cheats, no changes, all by tracys rules}
Today was one of the best days so far.
I felt like I had boundless energy and I was seriously in the best mood all day.
{when i called bethany for my 8am check in, her first response to my “good morning!” was, “oh!  someone’s happy!”}
I think knowing the first 10 days are over helped in a major way!
And that’s my BIG encouragement for you all thinking of doing this.
If you can promise yourself the first five days following Tracy’s rules to the T….
you will overcome the HARDEST part.
And after the first five days, you won’t WANT to quit!
I promise.
The first five days were the hardest.
Breaking the diet coke/sugar addiction.
Trying new foods.
Cooking every day.
Feeling the hunger pangs while my stomach had to shrink from all the overeating I had done.
{sounds fun, ya?  i know, makes you TOTALLY want to do it…}
It’s becoming a habit, and I don’t even consider that cheating is option.
My cravings are decreasing, and my pallet is increasing….
I have fallen into a rhythm of making my meals the day before whenever I have some free time.
And working out is now something fun rather than a burden.
Okay, some days it starts as a burden, but as soon as I get into it, I’m sooo relieved I showed up.
And that’s just 10 days in, you guys.
Today’s food was actually pretty satisfying.
I was a bit confused by the TWO oranges and TWO grapefruits for breakfast, so I decided that one and one seemed more appropriate.
And actually it was just the right amount.
I didn’t think I was going to dig the veggies & dip, but I actually liked it.
Except for the jicama.
Can I just say that jicama is way more fun to say than it is to eat?
But I dipped away, ate, swallowed and chased every bite with water until I got them all down.
The good thing was it didn’t make gag, so that’s a plus.
Lunch and dinner….yum.
Although, leek?
Who eats leek and why?
I mean, I ate it, but I’d be okay if I didn’t have to again.
Tomorrow I am more than ecstatic about choco-blueberry pudding.
Not so ecstatic about the exact same dinner as tonight.
What’s that about?
I mean, not that I’m questioning Tracy or anything…
but to question Tracy, 
why is that?
And I finished with a bang.  
40 reps of all with ankle weights and 7 minutes of arms, followed by 45 minutes of trampoline dancing since my shins are still in the healing process.
Plus, I think I’m actually a better dancer on the trampoline than the floor anyway.
I still have yet to attempt the jeans.
But, I did think that maybe tomorrow I would attempt my fat pants, since even those were tight before I started this plan.
Baby steps for this lil gal.
I’ll keep you posted.
tomorrow you’ll be “meeting” bethany…my 30 day partner in crime and one of my bestest friends.
© 2010 “Le Musings of Moi”
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It means so much that you are here! I know life gets busy though, so if you don't want to miss a thing, I invite you to subscribe to my blog through email!