the p.m.s. they don’t warn you about

Its only been 3 weeks since being home.

3 weeks that I have battled feelings of homesickness and restlessness…
for a country that isn’t even mine.

For countries I haven’t even been to, yet.

Being back hasn’t been easy.
While I am incredibly thankful for my hot showers and comfortable bed, I remember just how content I can be without them.
And sometimes?
Having so much, and remembering those that don’t…leaves me feeling burdened.                                                                          
Nobody warned me about this.
This “being back home, when your heart longs to be somewhere else,” kind of blues.

Which is otherwise known in my house as P.M.S. 
(post missions trip syndrome)


In the last three weeks I’ve found myself revisiting the pictures, studying my Spanish, and praying for the children I know and even for the ones I have yet to meet.

I’m studying different third world countries and their needs, wanting to go and be a part of it all.

And then through it all, I’m trying to sit at the feet of the Lord, patiently waiting for him to clearly say once again, “Go.”

I want so much more than a one week trip, more than just 3-4 hours a day teaching stories and playing games.

I want to visit their homes and meet their families.
I crave to understand their struggles, and witness all that brings them joy.

I long to be their friend….
A part of their family.
To be someone they can trust, who comes alongside and loves with them….

…. bearing all things, believing all things, hoping for all things, enduring all things…

And for the first time in our life as a family, God has every one of us in a place where we would let go of whatever he asked…all to say “yes” to whatever it is he has planned.

Our hearts are ready.
We have no plan, except the one to follow God.

And now that I’ve had a taste of what that plan could be for our life….
I crave it more and more.

We may not know His long term plan clearly, but there is definitely an excitement and a waiting expectancy in my home.

So that heaviness, that P.M.S, is absolutely okay…
because it just shows me that God has truly called us to so much more than what we’re doing now!

I found this quote the other day when I was researching details on starting our Dominican Orphanage, and it gave me such incredible peace, that I had to share…

For it is now the life my family and I are living…

‘This is a “faith walk” from start to finish. God doesn’t allow us to see the end of the road, just where to take our next step. He doesn’t provide a blue print to explain every detail. We listen for His voice and strive to follow His lead. The first thing we must do on this journey is seek the Lord for direction by asking, “Lord what would you have me do this year [today], what are my assignments?” We must ask God these questions because it is easy for us to miss God and assign ourselves work that we may not be called to do.’

We’ve been assigned.
And we’re starting with the Dominican Orphanage.
© 2013 “Le Musings of Moi”
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  1. […] not going to lie…I’ve been suffering a bit from PMS (post missions trip syndrome) these last few weeks, and taking it slow on my blog & YouTube channel to instead spend more […]