you are never "too much" for a true friend

The last few years God has truly been filtering out and rearranging my friendship circle.  At the time it was incredibly hurtful and very uncomfortable, and I most definitely didn’t quite get what God was allowing and why….but now???

Now I get it, and I am SO THANKFUL.
Sometimes I look at my husband and kids… 
and then look beyond to my circle of friends, 
and then go even further beyond to our church and my online community (YOU!)…
and suddenly I am overwhelmed with tears and awe.

{a little mush mush, i know.}


But, I certainly wouldn’t know the depths of these relationships had I not walked through some seasons of droughts and testing.

I absolutely would not know who my true friends are had they not seen me at my very worst…..
and loved me through it.
I wouldn’t appreciate the support, or the hearts, or the stories, or the intent….
had I not experienced all that God has allowed me to walk through.
A lot of my life I have felt misunderstood.
Or felt different.
I may have been surrounded, but a lot of the time I felt Alone.
I’ve said it before, I just always felt (and told) I was “too much…” of whatever it may be.
But these last few years, when I was at the peak of some of that “too much,” that is when God not only refined me….but he also refined my definition of friendship.

And He showed me that I would never be “too much” for the ones that were meant to be.
The friends I have now are my family.
They are my forever friends…and I don’t doubt that for a moment.

When you have walked through the mud and they are still there walking with you….you just know.
It turns out, the friends God chose for me are absolutely WORTH the heartache I felt in losing the ones I had chosen for myself.
It’s not to say they weren’t necessarily good people….they just didn’t or couldn’t understand.
Or they just happened not to be right for me, for my life….or perhaps vice versa.
I know that being abandoned, or dumped, or suddenly ignored without any explanation from someone you loved and trusted hurts.  
I’ve been there.
I know the pain of baring your soul to someone, only to have them misunderstand your heart….
I’ve felt that.
I know what it’s like to expose your weaknesses only to have them thrown back in your face as way of hurting you.

But, I also know that the pain of all of that begins to heal the moment you give it to God, and you just say….
“Okay God.  You know better than me.  Bring me the right friends at the right time.”
And HE WILL.
And they will be your angels.
God has surrounded me with them…
and finally I feel comforted, protected, loved and UNDERSTOOD….
and it’s feels incredible.

“…it feels like home to me….”
It’s a glimpse of Him…
and that you guys… 
is what heals all hurts and wounds.

Never stop praying.
Never stop being exactly who you are….
Because you will find your people…your angels…and you WILL be blessed.

{p.s. YOU are my people.  YOU have been my angels.  Thank you for investing into me, and this blog, and for showing me what it’s meant to look like.}
© 2012 “Le Musings of Moi”
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