are you a SAD girl? there’s an APP for that.

I used to be a SAD girl.

{also known as a Scale ADdict….}

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It used to control my life, my days, my emotions.

Each and every morning I would wake up and right after a good pee, I’d step on that baby and let out a deep breath…hoping in some scientific way that just maybe that breath would release another half a pound.

And then, ever so reluctantly, I would look down and focus in on a number that would then determine exactly how I would feel about myself for the rest of that day.

That three digit number controlled me.

If it was within range of my ideal, I would smile, bounce out of the bathroom and sing a lovely song with the birds outside my window.

If it was above my range, even by a half pound, tears would well up in my eyes and I’d pinch my stomach, my thighs, my arms….and want to crawl back into bed because something was obviously so wrong with me that I couldn’t keep to a “simple” goal.

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Can you even imagine such a life?
I bet you can.
Because I know for a fact that I’m not the only SAD girl out there.

This went on for years.
YEARS!!!!
So many mornings wasted.  So many days wasted.  So many TEARS wasted!!!

If you’ve followed me for a length of time, you know my journey through my body image issues….and you know that finally at one point I just decided enough was enough.

So I schlepped my SAD bootie into counseling and decided to face it head on and find healing.

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But I didn’t find healing in just the counseling.
I mean it was good, and it was necessary, and I certainly began to understand WHY I had those issues and quite possibly WHERE they came from….but what I didn’t get from it was a cure.

There was no formula written down that allowed me to be free.
I had to find that for myself…and little did I know, there was an APP for that.Action, Prayer, and Patience.

I could no longer WISH to change…I had to take ACTION to change.
And that is when I gave up the scale for good.
While it didn’t fix me instantly by doing so, it was a HUGE catalyst in helping me to let go of the daily struggle I faced.
{along with that, I read Change Your Habits Change Your Life, which also helped tremendously!}

But in order to find strength for those ACTIONS, I needed a lot of PRAYER.
I had little self control when it came to my bad habits, and I definitely accepted that I needed all the spiritual strength I could get.
I knew that God’s hope was for me to see myself through His eyes.
The same eyes I see my own daughter through….and so daily…hourly sometimes, I would lift up my struggles in PRAYER.
And when I did, He was, WITHOUT FAIL, faithful to provide comfort and strength.

Finally, I had to find PATIENCE.
Or rather, I had to pray for PATIENCE.
Since this struggle didn’t come on overnight, I had to come to terms with the fact that it wouldn’t be cured overnight either.
I would never make progress without a little patience and grace.

And now it’s been 6 months since I’ve stepped on a scale and looked at the numbers (i have stepped on the scale at the doctors, but asked them not to tell me)…and I feel that I truly am free from that addiction.  BUT, I am not naive enough to think that I am absolutely healed and cured, and I’m okay with that.  Because I am learning that the best things in life take TIME….and on this I will not give up.

I am far from recovered, yet absolutely reformed.

If you’re thinking you couldn’t do it…that you are destined to be a SAD girl for life…
know this:
I could have NEVER imagined giving it up either.
In fact, I remember my sister telling me she didn’t own a scale one day, and I looked at her like she had a third eye.
Who didn’t own a scale and live by it every single day???

A happy girl, that’s who.

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And that’s exactly who I’m becoming each and every day I apply my APP.

I have to ask….
Are you a SAD girl?
Are you finally ready to get the APP and join me in recovery?

It maybe tough…but in the end, I promise you…
The freedom you’ll feel is kind of ahhh mazing.
~~~~~~~

{obviously there are lots of people out there fully able to weigh daily and be okay and healthy and normal about it.  for those of you, consider yourself blessed, and weigh on!}

*um….i think i found the topic for the book i’ll write one day, ya think?
can you say soapbox?

links are to relevant stories of mine, and in addition here’s more of the story behind me
in case you missed it.

all images via weheartit

© 2011 “Le Musings of Moi”

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Comments

  1. I usually do it once a week? But I can tell more with how my clothes fit, and try to adjust with eating and workout habits to make it better:-) BUT I do have to say my hubby weighs himself several times a day!

  2. awesome awesome awesome post. it’s like you got inside my weighed-daily head. i NEEDED to hear this. thank you
    -Minivan Mama, http://www.wethreemoms.com

  3. I’m one of those that has to weigh myself. I don’t care for it when the numbers aren’t where I want them to be – but I don’t let it determine how I feel about myself.

  4. Thanks Summer! Love the topic! Hits home big time!! I was thinking of you tonight while I was at Whole Foods trying to figure out which Gaba I should try. They were all different amounts and I forgot my Mood Cure book. Don’t have an iphone so I couldn’t look it up. Guess I’ll be going back next week. Love the book and can’t put it down but I also can’t stay up all night reading so….patience!!!

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