I hate breaking up. Someone always gets hurt.
I thought when I got married, I would never have to feel the pain of being left again. (My husband is much too smart to ever leave me, you see.)
But, I was wrong.
My heart is about to break, because I’m getting ready to go through yet another break up. And. I. Just. Can’t. Say. Goodbye.
When I said here, that my longest relationship to date is my marriage to Jimmy….I lied. But, it was an accidental lie. You see, I’ve been in denial. I. Just. Can’t. Say. Goodbye.
It’s time you knew. There is someone else.
Her name…
{yes, I said her.}
Her name is Aviva. And she is my hair therapist. And she is leaving me.
It was between me and love in San Fran….and apparently, love won out.
Aviva and I have been together for close to ten years. We been through boyfriends, job changes, career changes, marriages, babies, anxiety….you name it and we have been through it together.
We’ve also been through lots of hair changes. Red, black, red and blonde, black and red, blonde one shade, blonde another shade. Short hair, medium hair, layered hair, bangs, no bangs, long hair, pregnant hair, after pregnancy hair, and more recently….gray hair.
Wherever Aviva goes, there I have gone too. From this salon to that salon, I have followed. And when she was inbetween salons, my dear girl came to my house, put foil in my hair in the backyard and then stood barefoot in my tub to wash out the color.
She has been dedicated. She has put up with my demands. She knows me, my hair, my heart, my issues….woah, the issues, and yet she still let me come back every 6-8 weeks to sit in her chair.
And now she’s leaving.
My hair is scared. Who will understand the way it likes the blonde to begin at the root? Who will know that striped highlights aren’t it’s thing? Who will know the difference between a bob and a short cut? Who will know the difference between being blonde and the other kind of being blonde?
More importantly, who will listen to my stuff and get it? Who will be right there with me when I need to laugh, or cry, or go deep. Who will talk endlessly about writing, books and anxiety, and just….get it and all the while they are making me beautiful at the same time? Who has that talent other than Aviva?
So, you see why I’ve been hesitant to talk about this. About her. But, with it being only 6-8 weeks away, I think it’s time to pay her the tribute she deserves.
Thanks Aviva. For getting me through Beauty School Apprenticing, for taking me from blonde to black to blonde again, for helping me overcome wedding day jitters, for rushing me in so I could have cute hair for the birth of my babies…for helping me breathe through an almost panic attack in your chair, for getting deep and personal about God and Jesus, for laughing with me…for encouraging me…
You are so much more than my hair therapist, you’re a special friend and I and my hair will miss you. {And should I get rich, I will so be flying you in every 6-8 weeks! So, be ready.}
© 2009 “Le Musings of Moi”
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I am so saddened to hear about your loss. It sounds like your time together was really special. Hang in there.
I TOTALLY feel for you! Been there!! Best wishes in your time of need! 🙂
i am here for you. this is tragic. what are you going to do??? more importantly, what is your HAIR going to do?
Honie, here’s my shoulder to cry on. Need a tissue too! Girl, the break up between a good hairdresser and her woman is almost worse than that of a man and woman. For real!! Who can find a good hair dresser these days. I’m in search mode now and the pickings are slim.
Hair, Hair. You’ll be okay. There’s another therapist out there for you I’m sure.
I’ve gone through this a time or two.
Take one day at a time, and don’t let anyone tell you how to grieve.
When you finally find someone new (and trust me, you will) it will be different at first, and you will comparing everything “Aviva didn’t hold her scizzors that way. Aviva always started on my left side…”, but eventually you will be settled in again and loving your new hair therapist.
And then she’ll move, and you’ll start the process all over again.
Godspeed.
It’s so sad that I don’t have a hair therapist like that. But then again who would hang around for 3 years between dos? Here’s to the perfect stylist on the first try.
Aw, man! I’m so sorry for your loss! =(
OMGosh!!! I can soooo relate and I am grieving with you. I just sent a threatning e mail to my hair dresser that if SHE should ever move…..AUGH. I need a drink, just the thought of it can put me over the edge. Rooooochelle
Yes the good ones always get away!
so sad…maybe there will be a very fun new aviva. not. peace to you…:)
Oh! That is TERRIBLE! My stylist moved (and then came back 8 months later, thank God!) and I didn’t get my hair cut for 8 months. It sounds like Aviva is absolutely incredible! So sorry she’s leaving… 🙁
That’s a great tribute! It is really hard to find a good hair stylist, so I fee for you. 🙁
Oh Summer!! Makin’ me cry! Thanks for the kind tribute. You will always be special to me and I am ever so grateful to have you in my life and all of the special times we have shared. You have been a guiding light for me. We’ve laughed, we’ve cried, we’ve shampooed! I am so grateful to have gained a such a special friendship with such a special person. xoxo
I totally get it. I would be in a sheer PANIC if my hair dresser left somewhere I could not follow. It’s amazing how that little 3 hour period every 8 weeks makes up a HUGE difference in my life every day in between! HUGE! It’s hard to find someone who gets it right! I hope you can find someone else … I’m sorry!
My heart aches for you. I know your pain. I had an Aviva once, too. I used to drive from upstate NY to Richmond, VA every 2 months for her to do her thing. I swear. Then I moved (again) to NC and I had to find someone new… I had a baby and the 10-hour round-trip just wasn’t convenient anymore. So I found another Aviva (sort of…)… then I moved AGAIN. And now? Now? My new Aviva is the BEST Aviva I’ve ever had. Not that you’d know it to look at me right now, as I’m woefully behind on my hair-schedule. Anyway, my (long, drawn-out) point was that it’ll be OK. You’ll miss her… but someone new will come along and be wonderful. Really!!
that sucks! i’m sorry, honey. it’s sooooo hard to find a good hair stylist. 🙁
🙂
Great post! I went through a very similar “break-up” a few years ago, but luckily for me, my sister stepped up to the plate and went to beauty school 🙂
Happy Tuesday!
So sorry it didnt work out between you kids…
Hang onto the great memories.
J
Oh no! I’d hate to have to find someone to fill her shoes!
So sorry to read about your break-up….losing an awesome hairstylist is definitely worth grieving over!
Found your blog through BSU…congrats on being the featured blog!!!
Maybe this is the real problem with my hair. I’ve never had a relationship like this with a hair stylist.
My only advice is: be careful of the awful “rebound” relationships. You’re hair might never ever get over it.
Ah…a sad, sad day. Better save up your frequent flyer miles!
That is awful! I know exactly what you mean. I have been aimlessly searching for a good hairdresser for the last 4 years. I hope you find a suitable hairdresser sooner than that. Ugh.
I am so sorry for your breakup! I broke up with mine recently. It is always tough.
This just hurts to read Summer…I wish you had posted some kind of warning. There are tears streaming down my face for your hair. We’ll work through it. And like a good friend, I am here for you…with virtual chocolate. We’ll get through this.
I went through this kind of loss recently. It is just so sad. I hope that you find some one soon.
Oh and this was a totally sweet post.
Oh how I understand. I left Hawaii 6 YEARS AGO and still, no hair therapist that I love. I have been through many, but no one can cut my hair. I just pray you find someone that can do for you what Aviva did.
I’m so sorry for your loss! I used to not get it, the attachment to a stylist. Until I met my current, going on 4 years, stylist. She gets it. She gets the hair, the curls, the desire to be straight, the frizz, the don’t-dare-layer-it, the don’t-dare-thin-it-or-it’ll-frizz-more.
Hallmark needs a card for this.
Losing a great stylist or colorist is tragic.
I just lost my stylist and I’m not confident I’ll be able to replace her.
I feel……. lost.
Ouch…that sucks. Have some ice cream, you’ll feel better.
Oh, the horrors!! At least she left a note. I would HATE it if my girl left me!!
That’s way sad! It’s hard to replace someone like that. I lost “Sue” many years ago and have never really found another. But I know you will. I just KNOW it, ’cause you’re YOU.